Following my previous Shoe Porn post I was having a conversation with my roommate (who is male and as fashion illiterate as they come, don't be offended Frank it's not a bad thing). Surprisingly he was able to appreciate all the styles I posted, "even the weird pointy one on the wedge" he said. Guess nothing's hotter than a woman in heels knowing she's rockin it. Which leads us to here, there's an over saturated amount of styles in footwear and with the good comes plenty of bad. This is a tribute to the bad, the terrible and just plain ugly. Take note my fellow fashionistas, yes style is a form of self expression and you should always strive to be unique, but being outrageous just for the sake of outrageous-ness will bound to get your on the worst dressed list.
Think Gaga circa ancient Greek god of travel. When you get sick of walking everyday like mere mortals, these wings for your tired feet will give you godly powers like Hermes.
Who needs Red Bull! These jellies "gives you wings!"
These will give them Shape Ups a run for their money. Pun intended.
S&M? Bondage? Whatever you're into there's a shoe out there just for you!
Looks like this shoe was designed by someone with multiple personality disorder.
Can't decide between sneakers or heels? Get your glitz and street chic all in one with these beauts!
Yes, what I really want is adult sized cabbage patch kids shoes.
Any man that can rock these looks is the man for me. I mean, this is pure sex appeal.
Shoes that double as sushi platter?? How convenient!
Just got your toes did and the salon ran out of those disposable flip flops? Slip on these stylish pumps instead, you'll be adding pizazz to your outfit and the pedi won't get ruined!
Some bitch grabbed the last pair of Louboutins in your size at a sample sale and she's out of slapping range? Fear not! Just sling shot her with your stilettos!
This serves so many purposes! Impossible long line during a post season sale? Boyfriend complaining of boredom after just a few hours at the mall? Whiny children because you won't get them ice cream at the food court? Just pop out the game boy from the platform of your shoe and you'll be good to go!
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After all that I just had to posted something simple, classic, sexy and elegant.
The End.
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